I've been reading Ann Voskamp's book One Thousand Gifts for
a while now. Usually I just cruise through anything I can put on front of my
nose but this one I've been taking my time with.
In Chapter 7, she recounts an incident with one of her sons getting
angry with his brother and her response is anger. She writes:
Really? I lay my head on the table. Do I really smother
my own joy because I believe that anger achieves more than love? That Satan's
way is more powerful, more practical, more fulfilling in my daily life than
Jesus' way? Why else get angry? Isn't it because I think complaining,
exasperation, resentment will pound me up into the full life I really want?
When I choose - and it is a choice - to crush joy with bitterness, am I not
purposefully choosing to take the way of the Prince of Darkness? Choosing the
angry way of Lucifer because I think it is more effective - more expedient -
than giving thanks?
Sadly, I can identify with everything she said. James 1:20
says, "for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God
desires." But yet, I forget, and I use the enemy's tool of anger when
what I'm trying to lead my children to live a fruitful life.
Anger is not a fruit of the Spirit.
Anger and thankfulness cannot dwell together in my
heart.
Colossians 3:12-17 Therefore, as God’s chosen
people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness,
humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever
grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in
perfect unity.
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since
as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word
of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all
wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in
your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in
the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
I recently had the kids make "Pockets of Praise"
and taped them up on the wall. We just took construction paper, folded it in
half, stapled it, and decorated the front with their name. Now, I look
throughout the day for things I can praise them for and I secretly write it down
on a slip of paper and stick it in their pocket. Everyone participates in
writing down things they see others doing that are praiseworthy. At dinner
time, Daddy gets to take all the papers out and read them off in front of the
whole family. For example, "Emily was quick to get up and get Johnny a
drink of water when Mom asked. She quickly and cheerfully obeyed Mom and served
her brother in love."
Words of encouragement is not one of my gifts. I think nice
things about others but I don't always say them out loud. But man, am I quick
to criticize. Ugh!
These Pockets of Praise have helped me to focus on the
positive more than the negative just a little bit more.
When I need to discipline one of my kids, or if I have a
difference of opinion with someone, or I am trying to help others settle
disputes, being covered up with God's love, compassion, kindness, humility,
gentleness, and patience will be a lot more effective than the using ugly
weapon of anger.
